Monday, October 10, 2005
SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM SPAM . . .
WARNING! THIS POST CONTAINS WHAT SOME WOULD CALL “ADULT” MATERIAL.
Do you get much spam in your mail box? I sure do. For quite a while I didn’t get much, or at least I didn’t see much, but the spammers have gotten more clever (sort of like anything “foolproof” just spawns better fools, I suppose) and lots of stuff is getting through. Some of them are pretty outrageous. The subject lines are terrifically explicit, even. You’ll see when I reproduce a few below. I’m going to reproduce them because I’ve been thinking of putting up a web site that would use the same exact come-ons, but would actually not be the least bit pornographic. How? Well, consider.
One I got today said, “Sex Kitten Licks Cock.” Okay, I can do that. Just as soon as I find a sexy young girl who’s willing to run her tongue over a chicken.
Or consider this other one from last week, “Mature Ebony Sucks Hard.” Wow, that shouldn’t be too hard. I’ll just show some footage of Oprah having a milkshake from McDonalds. Seems like that ought to do it, doesn’t it?
I have a female Basset hound, so I’m thinking of posting something with the come-on line of “This Bitch Loves It Doggy Style.” She lounges about on a recliner on her back, so it will even look, you know, slutty and all.
Think what could be done with the line “Fast Hardbody Action.” Don’t NASCAR vehicles have hard bodies? Don’t they drive pretty fast?
The only trouble could be possible charges of fraud. But, considering the amount of fraud perpetrated by the “legitimate” porn industry, I’m not sure anyone would ever bother to prosecute.
Whattya Think? Is it a winner?
Do you get much spam in your mail box? I sure do. For quite a while I didn’t get much, or at least I didn’t see much, but the spammers have gotten more clever (sort of like anything “foolproof” just spawns better fools, I suppose) and lots of stuff is getting through. Some of them are pretty outrageous. The subject lines are terrifically explicit, even. You’ll see when I reproduce a few below. I’m going to reproduce them because I’ve been thinking of putting up a web site that would use the same exact come-ons, but would actually not be the least bit pornographic. How? Well, consider.
One I got today said, “Sex Kitten Licks Cock.” Okay, I can do that. Just as soon as I find a sexy young girl who’s willing to run her tongue over a chicken.
Or consider this other one from last week, “Mature Ebony Sucks Hard.” Wow, that shouldn’t be too hard. I’ll just show some footage of Oprah having a milkshake from McDonalds. Seems like that ought to do it, doesn’t it?
I have a female Basset hound, so I’m thinking of posting something with the come-on line of “This Bitch Loves It Doggy Style.” She lounges about on a recliner on her back, so it will even look, you know, slutty and all.
Think what could be done with the line “Fast Hardbody Action.” Don’t NASCAR vehicles have hard bodies? Don’t they drive pretty fast?
The only trouble could be possible charges of fraud. But, considering the amount of fraud perpetrated by the “legitimate” porn industry, I’m not sure anyone would ever bother to prosecute.
Whattya Think? Is it a winner?
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Oh, I'd like to put something like this on my funny pages, but I promised some rating services I wouldn't stray beyond a PG. So, here it is.
